Welcome to a second edition of Friday Fictioneers. I am now two for two. Woot woot! This one is also coming in at an even 100 word count – yay! If you’re unfamiliar with Friday Fictioneers, it’s when writers take on the challenge of writing a 100 word story, poem, haiku, based on a photo prompt. The picture is posted on Wednesday and on Friday we share our stories and links. It’s a lot of fun and I invite you jump in and join us. Click on the link and head on over to Rochelle Wisoff-Fields’ blog, take a look around and decide if it’s right for you.
I’m going to apologize up front because I already know I will fail miserably at visiting other posts and blogs today, as well as over the next week. Men will be tearing apart my house in the early morning tomorrow and I’m frantically packing things up so that my furniture can be moved bright and early upon their arrival. I’m getting new carpet. Yay! It’s not a lot of fun packing up china cabinets and book cases, or everything the kids’ rooms, plus dismantling their bunk beds, but it will be worth it. When they leave late Saturday, I need to put everything back and start packing for my trip. There’s little time to breathe in the middle. It’s crazy!
Now on to the good stuff…flash fiction!
The Frozen Unknown
Bursting through the door, Carl ran down the slope. Why did kids always ignore the posted signs?
“Hey! It’s not safe here!” he yelled.
“Run!”
Fits of laughter exploded as children ran in every direction. Can’t they see the cracks? They flirt with danger, not understanding the gravity of their actions.
Carl walked the length of their scattered tracks, tracing the spider veins at his feet. Kneeling, he brushed the snow aside revealing the hard iced lake beneath. The surface was cloudy, but clear enough to see within its depth. Still there, her frozen face stared up at him, unblinking.
•~O~•
Mood music to set the tone. I recommend you read the story before hitting play.
I’ve never walked on a frozen lake that wasn’t man-made. Have you enjoyed such wonders? Ever ice skated on one?
To enjoy more flash fiction by other great writers click on the link. Thanks for stopping by. Ciao.
Happy weekend readers!
~oOo~
I recently saw a mock-up of the new blog design and WOW am I excited. Laird is one amazing lady. Now to get my book published! 🙂
How can one so sweet and innocent looking be so blood thirsty. Good one… Carl sounds like a bad apple indeed.
Good luck with your carpet, Debra… glad you came back.
Carl might be just that, a bad apple. OR, he might be protecting everyone from a greater evil. We don’t know since the story ends where it does. Food for thought. Thanks, Ted!
The carpet looks great! Now I need a team of magical fairies to put my house back together. Any takers? Anyone? Anyone? LOL
What a beginning for a creepy story. I’d love to see how it continues and learn how she ended up under the ice.
Skating is awesome. I used to figure skate when I was a kid but had to stop because I didn’t want to start competing and that was the only level of coaching available. I try to go skating at least a few times every winter when a huge ice path is made on our local lake. And next winter my kids are old enough to start learning 🙂
I actually have two very different stories not developing in my head as to how that happened. Maybe I’ll get to them someday. So many projects on my plate!
I used to figure skate when I was a kid as well. Twisted my ankle up real good. Never competed, never wanted to. Never had a lake to skate on. Took my daughter skating for the first time this last year. She loved it. They had this bar handles she could push around the rink. I’d never seen them before. Skating isn’t the same when the rink is crammed full of people simply skating in a circle. If you go against the grain you’re liable to cause an accident. I bet you will have an amazing time taking your kids out on the ice. So much fun!
I really wish I’d waited to read this AFTER I wake up later today. If I have nightmares (or morning-mares, lol), I’ll know who to blame (Robert Downey Jr., Robert Downey Jr., Robert Downey Jr….). 🙂
Wow, that music is CREEPY…and fits the story very well. It reminds me of an old David McCallum/Patty Duke movie called, She Waits. Scared the living snot out of me when I was a kid…but I loved it…and watched it every time it came on an old movie channel. That’s what the music put me in mind of. I’ll have to see if the movie is available anywhere to see if I’m remembering it right.
Glad your week is not MY week. Good grief. Did you sit down one day when you were making the reservations and say, hmm…my life isn’t crazy busy enough, so I’m REALLY going to earn my vacation this year? It’s going to be a lot of fun when you get home for your real vacation…cause everyone knows that moms work harder on vacations than any other time of the year…to see your new bathroom and carpet. Try to relax at some point this week. 🙂
I hope this didn’t give you nightmares/morning-mares. maybe you got lucky and spent some time with Robert? I hope so.
Things are crazy. Hopefully I’m starting to make a dent in some of it. Keeping my fingers crossed. The house does look good. See response to Ted.
What a disturbing and well written little tale. Glad you’re back, Debra,
Shalom,
Rochelle
Thank you, Rochelle! I’m glad to be back. Thank you for providing this week’s prompt. As you can see, it really inspired me.
I love ice skating but perhaps not on this pond! Chilling, in all the good ways. Good luck with the carpet. I’m trying to get our house ready for painters and then to get on the market. It’s bit of a job. :-/
That’s what I like to hear! “Chilling, in all the good ways.” Sorry to hear you have the big prep for market job ahead of you. I hope it’s for all the right reasons and you will be rewarded with your new location very soon.
Hi Debra,
An excellent story with a hidden dark twist at the end. Hope you keep coming back and posting these kinds of stories. Ron
Thank you, Ron. I enjoy a surprise in a story, dark ones can be rather fun and interesting. 😉 I believe I will be sticking with the Friday fictions. . I may have chosen a crazy time to start as far as my schedule goes, but I think I can keep up with the posts, if not the blog visits.
Wow! You are the master of the surprise twist!
When I was a kid, I had a friend who had a pond in her yard, and yes, we skated on it. Good times!
A pond in her yard? Now that is really cool! What awesome memories to have! Thanks, Jennette.
What a creepy turn.
*Insert sinister laugh* 🙂
Wow, sounds like he has more than one reason for the signs. I wonder what happens when spring comes.
Indeed. Is spring something he has to worry about? Probably. But I had to throw that question out there. I had no idea how many questions this prompt would open up. Thanks so much for stopping by, Anne!
What a creepy end. Being trapped under the ice summarizes my worst fears. Still I love ice skating on natural ice and do it most every winter. Well told story.
Yeah, I rather hate being cold. Being trapped under the ice does not sound good to me either. Now you’ve managed to make me jealous of your natural ice skating locations. The season should be approaching soon. 😀 Thank you for your kind words. They are greatly appreciated.
Season starts in January, takes a while for water to cool of. I will post pictures.
I can’t wait to see them.
Beautifully done, Debra! Uber-creepy… great job! 🙂
Uber-creepy? Cool! Thank you much!
Oooohhhh, creepy cool. Best of luck with the carpet guys! It’s going to look gorgeous when it’s all done and everything is back where it belongs. Wish I could help you.
Oh my! The carpets look SO awesome! Scott is so happy he asked me what I thought the cost would be to change out our kitchen, family room and entryway . 😀 Of course I didn’t encourage as we’re currently bleeding money. LOL. Half of our stuff is still in the garage. The put back process is going to be slow with the organize and clean- up he has us doing. It won’t be completed before our vacation so I can look forward to that job upon our return. 🙂
That gave me a shiver. Very creepy 🙂 Good job!
A shiver is a good thing. Glad you liked it. Thanks, Marcy.
Dear Debra,
Come spring, he’d better stop returning to her. Great story, Miss two for two!
Aloha,
Doug
Come spring there will be no ice to walk on out to the center of the lake. Do you think she’ll still be ithere? Is she dead? Or will the ice melting free her?
Hi Debra, I really like how you set this story up. The ending changes everything.
Good luck with the week’s craziness. I’m thinking about new carpet now, only as a way to clean out my kids’ rooms!
That’s exactly how we are treating it. Not everything that came out is going back in. We have been thinking about new carpet for a very long time. I can’t even tell you how badly we needed this. Thanks for swinging by with such a lovely compliment.
You are definitely two for two! I want more! I’m sure you’d have more twists and turns to surprise us.
You’re right, I might have more. I may have to take some notes on this one. I’m so glad you liked it. 😀
A creepy tale….Nicely done. I have been out on the ice, ice fishing, skating…The cracking of the ice when the lake and ice settle on position is well….unsettling.
I can only imagine how unsettling it can be. I think once would be enough for me. I wouldn’t feel the need to return. LOL. Maybe I’m letting my own story get to me know. I really appreciate you coming by, Tom. Thank you.
Chilling! Well done!
Thank you! Chilling is a good thing. I’ll gladly take it.
Creepy. Loved it.
I’m glad you think so, Shirley. Thanks a million for stopping by!
Good (great) music choice! I might’ve seen the end coming if the music had been playing, but without music, it caught me totally off-guard!!!
Scott