Look… Woot! A Show and Tell Tag!

It’s been a while since I’ve posted a sample of my work on the blog. To be honest, I shy away from it. I tend to take the safe rather than sorry philosophy when  it comes to considering querying agents and publishers.

But a new meme is making its way  around the blogosphere. Maybe you’ve seen it? It’s called “Look” and I was lucky enough to get tagged, not once but twice, recently. The fabulous authors that tagged me: Romance writer Kristy K. James (check out her books here) and YA fantasy writer Krystal Wade (Take a look at her Wild Fire Series).  I love both these women and thank them for the tag!

According to the rules, the game works a little something like this: I run a search in my  work in progress for the word “look” and then paste the surrounding paragraph(s), tagging as many people as possible. When I was first tagged, I considered giving you the first look at my work on Unintentional Angel or Nulled, but when I saw where the search landed on the newly reworked opening of The Bringer Trilogy I had no choice but to share. So, without further ado:

I barely manage to raise my hands in time. The sharp pricks of tiny glass shards slice through my skin as the car comes to a hard stop. My head slams into the dash and I see Crystia, surrounded by a soft light, standing on that shore in Hiddekel. Something tugs at my core, I want to go to her. And what else – green eyes? Dazed, I look up to see the back bumper of the construction truck protruding through the window of Jeremy’s once pristine Honda Civic.

Jeremy’s head lies against the steering wheel. His glazed over eyes stare back at me, absent of life. Deep crimson, gruesomely gorgeous, pools along his blonde hairline. Like molasses, it trickles down across his cheek, running a trail to his heart. There’s no mad dash for the cell phone, no urgent leap across the car. All need to rush is lost. Blinking, I stare at him confused by the emotions welling up inside me.

~          ~          ~

Oops. Did I just give something big away? Or not. *shrugs* Did that scene paint a proper picture?

Now for the tags. Do you want to be tagged? If I tagged you and you don’t feel like playing, that’s fine. If I didn’t tag you and you want to jump in, by all means – please do! There were more people I wanted to tag, but seriously, my list was getting ridiculous.

I was going to tag Angela Wallace but she just posted something absolutely amazing that fits this meme perfectly. Slip over there and read Whispers of Magic.

Melinda VanLone * Emma Meade * Jennette Marie Powell * August McLaughlin * Tameri Etherton * Tracey Livesay * Fabio Bueno * Angela Orlowski-Peart * Susie Lindau

~oOo~

I love hearing from you! If you enjoyed this post or any of my previous posts, I’d be delighted to have you hit the follow button or add this blog to your RSS feed! You may also find me on twitter at @DebraKrist. Tootles! Thanks for stopping by!

49 thoughts on “Look… Woot! A Show and Tell Tag!”

  1. Kristy K. JamesKristy K. James

    I love that scene! It was very descriptive…and very sad. Can’t wait to read the rest of it! 🙂

    • Debra KristiDebra Kristi

      Thank you, Kristy. Beta? 😉 I’m over halfway through the final (fingers crossed) edits. Going slow due to family.

  2. Naomi BaltuckNaomi Baltuck

    Sounds really good, Deb. I hope we’ll hear more! (You left us hanging on the cliff edge!)

    • Debra KristiDebra Kristi

      Sorry about that cliff hanger. I’m glad you enjoyed it. Thank you, Naomi.

  3. Fabio BuenoFabio Bueno

    Wow, Debra, what a haunting, wonderful scene! Great, vivid descriptions.
    This is so powerful, it should be the blurb for your novel.
    Thanks for the tag!

    • Debra KristiDebra Kristi

      I was happy to tag you, so – you’re welcome!
      Thank very much, Fabio! Haunting and powerful. Yay!

  4. jansenschmidtjansenschmidt

    That was a very nice paragraph, Debra. Glad you decided to share. I’m kind of bummed out now, but that’s only because you did such a nice job with your words.

    I’ll go read Natalie’s blog now. She’s always good for a laugh.

    Patricia Rickrode
    w/a Jansen Schmidt

    • Debra KristiDebra Kristi

      LOL. Sorry I bummed you out. But then I guess the scene came across correctly. I’m glad Natalie will be there to cheer you up. Note: my whole book doesn’t read this way. Could you imagine? Goodness! Thanks for reading!

  5. Kourtney HeintzKourtney Heintz

    Intense scene. Really vivid descriptions. Stellar writing. Made me recoil from my computer. 🙂

    • Debra KristiDebra Kristi

      Oh. Sorry I caused you to recoil. But thanks a million for the amazing compliment! Blowing you kisses!!! I can take criticism as well. Just so you know. I take it as the opportunity to improve. Everyone’s being so nice I feel like I paid the room.

  6. Jennette Marie PowellJennette Marie Powell

    I usually am not fond of first-person present tense, but this painted such a vivid picture, it pulled me right in, enough that I can’t help but want to read more. Nice work! And thanks for the tag. I’ll post mine next week. 🙂

    • Debra KristiDebra Kristi

      Thanks, Jennette! I’m currently editing this while writing another in third. Going back and forth can be confusing at times. I’ll stop with the third person and go, “Wait. What?” LOL. But it’s all good. I can’t wait to see what you post. No rush if you need a play day. 😉

    • Debra KristiDebra Kristi

      Wow. Thank, Coleen!!! Hope the rest of the book lives up to this. 😐

    • Debra KristiDebra Kristi

      Thanks, Myndi. We can all shed a tear for poor Jeremy. Sometimes the good must be sacrificed. *sniff* Thanks for stopping in! Will you be playing the game? 😀

  7. Karen McFarlandKaren McFarland

    Who knew that the word “Look” could lead to such an emotional heavy scene Debra? But I love how the first person, present tense pulls your reader quickly into the story. Excellent choice! 🙂

    • Debra KristiDebra Kristi

      Who knew. I was surprised when I ran the word through the search. I thought you’d be getting my opening paragraph to another book. But you didn’t. Saved. Although this is on the first page of the story from which it is pulled. I know it doesn’t fit your blogging style, but is there any chance you’ll play?

      • Karen McFarlandKaren McFarland

        Oh Debra, have pity on me please. I do appreciate you wanting me to get involved. And I would like to be a good sport. But I am in burn-out recovery girl. And I’ve had to take on a day job besides. I hope you understand. You did a job well done! Thanks for thinking of me! {{Hugs!}} 🙂

        • Debra KristiDebra Kristi

          No worries. I understand burnout COMPLETELY! I would say I am in recovery mood but Louise’s test begs to differ. I still teeter on the edge. I’m sorry to hear about the day job. I hope things come together for you soon. I’ll keep you in my prayers. Take it easy on yourself.

  8. susielindaususielindau

    I LOVE your snippet and vivid descriptions!
    I don’t know how I missed your blog post today. Thanks for the tweet!

    • Debra KristiDebra Kristi

      No worries about the miss. Life is busy! Now you get to search for the word “Look.” Hehehe. Thanks so much for the compliment. I’m pleased that you enjoyed the share. I’m particularly fond of how that part came out.

  9. EmmaEmma

    Great excerpt, Debra. Can’t wait to read more from you!! Hint hint.
    “Deep crimson, gruesomely gorgeous” – wonderful words.

    • Debra KristiDebra Kristi

      Emma, I can’t wait till everyone can read more! So glad you enjoyed it! I’ve learned so much from all my wonderful writer friends. 🙂

  10. Angela Orlowski-PeartAngela Orlowski-Peart

    This is a great excerpt, Debra. I am a visual person and love descriptive scenes. “Deep crimson, gruesomely gorgeous, pools along his blonde hairline. Like molasses, it trickles down across his cheek, running a trail to his heart.” – wow, awesome. Hurry up and finish that book. I WANT to read it now!

    • Debra KristiDebra Kristi

      That’s probably my favorite line in that snippet as well. Thanks, Angela. I’ll see what I can do about getting this baby to print. Need to find myself an agent. Best get on that. Sigh.

  11. Diana BeebeDiana Beebe

    Thank you for the chills! I look forward to reading the rest of it.

    • Debra KristiDebra Kristi

      You’re very welcome, Diane! Thanks so much for stopping in.

  12. August McLaughlinAugust McLaughlin

    Intense! Did you ever paint a picture. (Woot for present tense. ;))

    And what a fun meme. Thanks for tagging me, lady! And keep up the great work.

    • Debra KristiDebra Kristi

      Yay! A present tense lover! I’m struggling to keep my current piece in third person limited after doing three books for The Bringer in first. You’re welcome for the tag. I can’t wait to see what you and everyone else comes up with.

  13. Tameri EthertonTameri Etherton

    That scene totally gives me chills! The pictures just add to the feel of the story… my favorite line is, ‘ All need to rush is lost.’. Haunting.

    Dang. Thanks for tagging me, but you did such an amazing job, I hate to follow it up! Let’s see what I can come up with.

    • Debra KristiDebra Kristi

      You like my pictures? It doesn’t make me look like a bad driver? Hahahahaha!!! Yes, I own all those pictures. I know your follow up will be fabulous! Thank you for your kind words.

  14. Sheila SeabrookSheila Seabrook

    OMG, I love that bit of your scene. It’s so powerful, Debra. I can’t wait till you finish this book because I want to read it! Thanks so much for sharing your writing with us. 🙂

    • Debra KristiDebra Kristi

      Thank you, Sheila. You really know how to make a girl feel good. 🙂 Thanks for stopping by!

  15. Melinda VanLoneMelinda VanLone

    Hmmm….ok I’m depressed now and I haven’t even read the story. Now you have to tell me how it ends!

    • Debra KristiDebra Kristi

      🙁 Don’t be depressed Milnda. You’ve read beyond this point. It will go somewhere good. I promise, Miss HEA. 😉 Or at least, somewhere “hopeful.”

      • Kristy K. JamesKristy K. James

        Just chiming in here… Can’t have a happily ever after if there isn’t a bunch of ugly that happens first. 😉

  16. Jennifer M EatonJennifer M Eaton

    Very nice, Deb. Hope you will take us somewhere… umm… happy? Maybe? Good luck with it!

  17. lynettemburrowslynettemburrows

    Ooooh! How did I miss this? Vivid scene with tension ratcheting up skyward, lady, you do know how to tease your readers. LOL. Keep us posted on when this one hits print.

  18. Reetta RaitanenReetta Raitanen

    Wow, what an awesome excerpt. Conflict a ton and the description gives me shivers.

    • Debra KristiDebra Kristi

      Shivers are good! 😀 Conflict is always good. Thank you, Reetta!

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